Right where you are.

It seems like during the late evening hours, while I wait for my little one to wake for his midnight feeding, my midnight oil is burning.

"No matter where I am, healing is in Your hands."

I was told by a friend today, to love someone right where they are. I needed to be reminded of this and I'm thankful for friends who are comfortable enough with me to share a challenge like this. A true friendship, crafted by God and cultivated by two hearts wanting to become more like Christ should challenge you to be better.

No matter where we are in our lives, whether our spiritual strength is weakening or mighty like a fortress, we can find healing every single time by seeking out God's hand. I learned a lot about what that meant in the last year. People have loved me right where I am, skinned knees, beaten brow and all. The least I can do is return the favor and love each person in my life exactly where they are. They are not perfect. They make mistakes. They are the people in my life that choose to love me on a daily basis and accept me for who I am. I think we spend so much of our days making the choice to see through a worldly, judgemental screen when we look at people. I don't want to be like that. I want to love you where you are, wherever that is. The reason I want to do that is because God does.

I don't know what the future holds for my little family of 3. Will it become a family or 4, 5? Will there be hardships on that journey? Sure, there will be. Is the unfailing love of God within me, more capable than any other to bring me to it and then to bring me through it? YES!! Yes, He is. He said He would. He did and He'll do it again. Time and time again. That's what "unfailing" means. There is nothing else in this world that is unfailing. I love my husband so much, but he will fail me. I love my son... boy do I love my son, but he will fail me. If I expect them not to, I'm not loving them correctly. Only God can love me with an unfailing love and all I strive to do is to love them where they are, every step of the way in the best way that I know how- with everything in me. Tears, laughter, pain, joy... all of it. I'll give it to them because they deserve the best parts of me. Because God tells me the most important thing I can do is love them. When I fail them, and I will, God's grace will see us through and does not refuse.

The midnight oil that burns is like a soft glow in this room. It's when the world goes away and I hear and see. I see the smiles that happened today and try to remember them always. People think I take a lot of pictures... you should see the amount of photos you DON'T see. I do this so that I'll always see what my mind may forget. It's so important to me...

My parents have albums upon albums of photos of my brother and I growing up and when I look through them, I relive my childhood. I got my first camera when I was very young and began taking photos of everything I could. At 16, my parents bought me a video camera and the rest is history :) Something was awakened within me and I discovered how much I can see in a photograph- emotion that flutters away in seconds becomes permanent.

3 pounds to 11 pounds in 4 months flat.

Keep growing baby, just like that.